Musings from Motherhood
Good morning my love,
Every now and again I'm going to pop a post about motherhood and I know this can be a hard subject for some so please feel free to delete it from your inbox if that's the case. I don't think it's possible on Substack to remove yourself from sections but I'll look into it.
These are going to be more chatty and raw than many of my usual posts because I think it's so important to see the whole spectrum of Motherhood not just the shiny Instagram moments.
Right, on with the musings because I have a few that I'd love to explore with you…
Sense of self - anyone else feel like it changes you without you realising?! A lovely mum friend recommended the book Matrescence by Lucy Jones and wow, it has absolutely helped me make sense of the sizmic shift in my sense of self. It's well worth a read/listen if you're wondering what the hell is going on and why you have all of the raging hormones 5 months postpartum.
Body image - there are moments when I'm catapulted back to my teenage self who just was so uncomfortable in her body (if you've read Matrescence this will make sense). I have to have strong words with myself and walk the walk of remembering how I look is the least interesting thing about me. I'm in constant awe of the miracle that my body created but sometimes I wish my back didn't hurt and my boobs weren't saggy after a week of breastfeeding!
Flashbacks - anyone else have to check their baby is still there next to them and they aren't still in the throws of labour? I had this last night, catapulted back to the operating theatre waiting for little bean to be placed on my chest. Steady breaths (longer exhales than inhalers) and placing my hand in hers helped but it was still rough. I genuinely think everyone should be offered some form of talking therapy after childbirth because it's an enormous thing.
Intrusive thoughts - these seem to be getting more airtime on social media but when they happen my god they're scary! Our brain changes during pregnancy so we're more attended to threat but sometimes it needs to flipping well chill out!
Doom scrolling - it's too easy to do! And please if you see me posting on Instagram after 8pm tell me to go to bed 😂. I panic every time I see a post about milestones and constantly question whether I'm doing enough for bean’s development. This is where I employ some CBT tricks to catch the thought and replace it with a new one because none needs the bullshit of worrying they're not doing enough. Let's be honest, if you're worrying you're doing enough - you probably don't need to worry.
I would absolutely love to hear your musings on any of the above or things that you experienced / are experiencing - the more we talk about it the more we normalise the bonkers experience that is motherhood.
With tonnes of love,
Beth x